Your ceremony needs to be the
way you want it to be. The suggestions offered here as a sequence and for vows
are for you to consider. You may change, add or delete anything to better
reflect you and your personalities.
The basic vows (below) I use for civil ceremonies do not include anything religious, but I will include anything from your religious tradition at your request. (The two optional religious references in green now included in the vows below are the most frequently requested religious references---you may choose to keep them, add to them, or delete them--it is your ceremony). I can also provide additional samples of both civil and religious ceremonies for your consideration.
Creating a ceremony from the many different options can be confusing and frustrating at times! We have helped create hundreds of ceremonies to express just the right sentiments of the bride and groom on their wedding day. Don't hesitate to ask us for suggestions and assistance in putting your ceremony together---that's why we are here!
Your marriage ceremony can be in any sequence you choose, but the usual sequence is the following: If you desire a very brief ceremony, some parts of the ceremony can be deleted. The only necessary part is where both parties indicate a willingness ("I do") to be married to one another. However, most couples prefer something similar to below.
Part 1: Welcome; Part 2: Foundation; Part 3: Exchange of Vows; Part 4: Ring Exchange; Optional Part 5: Reading, and/or Unity Candle, and/or Blessing; Part 6: Pronouncement of Marriage; Part 7: Kiss!
Brief Welcome by Marriage Officiant
Groom's Name and
Bride's Name, We are
privileged to share today's happy occasion with you. We are here, not only to witness your commitment to each other, but also to wish
you both every happiness in your future life together as husband and wife. Within its framework of
commitment and loyalty, marriage enables the establishment of a home, where
through trust, patience and respect, the love and affection which you have for
each other may develop into a deep and lasting relationship.
We who
are witnessing your marriage, hope that, despite the stresses inevitable in any
life, your Love, Respect, trust, and understanding of each other will increase
your contentment and heighten your joy in living.
FOUNDATION: (Any Reading or description of what "marriage" stands for/involves .....)
Marriage
deepens and enriches every facet of life.
Happiness
is fuller, memories are fresher, commitment is stronger, even anger is felt more
strongly, and passes away more quickly.
Marriage understands and forgives the mistakes life is unable to avoid. It
encourages and nurtures new life, new experiences, new ways of expressing a love
that is deeper than life.
When
two people pledge their love and care for each other in marriage, they create a
spirit unique unto themselves which binds them closer than any spoken or written
words.
Marriage is a promise made in
the hearts of two people who love each other and the potential of marriage
requires a lifetime to fulfill.
Ceremony
Before you,
Groom's Name
and
Bride's Name, are joined in marriage in the
presence of
(optional) God and
these witnesses, I am to remind you of the serious and binding
nature of the relationship you are now about to enter.
Bride's Name
and
Groom's Name, if you now wish to make your marriage vows, please answer,
I do.
(Although many brides no longer include this as part of the ceremony, if the bride chooses to "be given away" it is usually at this point that I ask "Who gives this bride's hand in marriage?" However, it can also be done elsewhere, as desired, in the ceremony)
Exchange
of Vows:
(Choose from these vows, change them,
mix-and-match, or
compose your own.)
(Groom's Name)
take (Bride's Name’s)
to be your lawful wedded wife? I do. Will you love, respect, honor
and cherish her throughout your years together? I WILL.(Bride repeats the
vows.)
OR
2. (Groom's Name)
do you take (Bride's Name’s)
whom you now hold by the hand to be your
lawful wedded wife? I DO.
Do you promise to love, cherish and honor her, in sickness and in health,
for richer for poorer, for better for worse, and forsaking all others,
keep yourself only unto her, for so long as you both shall live? I DO
(Bride repeats the
same vows.)
or
(Groom's Name)do
you pledge to love (Bride's Name)
and throughout your years together to be honest, faithful, and kind to
her. Do you pledge to give to her the same happiness she gives to you, to
react to her as only you can, and to respect her for who she is, not who
you want her to be? I DO.(Bride repeats the same vows).
OR(Bride's
Name) whom you now hold by the hand to be your lawful
wedded wife? I DO.
(Bride's
Name) do you take (Groom's
Name) whom you now hold by the hand to be your lawful
wedded wife? I DO.(Groom's
Name) do you take (Bride's
Name) whom you now hold by the hand to be your lawful
wedded wife? I DO. (Groom's Name)do
you pledge to love (Bride's
Name) and throughout your years together to be
honest, faithful, and kind to her. Do you pledge to give to her the same
happiness she gives to you, to react to her as only you can, and to
respect her for who she is, not who you want her to be? I DO.(Bride repeats
the same vows)
Vows Repeated word-by-word by bride and groom:
The
vows below can be repeated by bride and groom (repeated to each other
after me by phrases—OR-- can also be read by bride and groom)
6. With all my heart I take you to be my wife./ I will love
you through the good and the bad,/ through the joy and the sorrow./ I will
try to be understanding,/ and to trust in you completely./ I will make you
a part of me/ and in turn, become a part of you./ Together we will face
all of life's experiences/ and share one anothers dreams and goals./ We
will be equal partners/ in an open, honest relationship throughout the
years.
(Bride
repeats the same vows.)
OR
7.
I, (Groom's Name), take you (Bride's
Name),/ to be my lawfully wedded husband./ I promise to love,
cherish and honor you/in sickness and in health/for richer for poorer/for
better for worse/and forsaking all others/keep myself only unto you/for so
long as we both shall live. (Bride would say comparable vows)
OR
Words of your
choice…………
Need
help with words
of your choice?…………Many different wordings for vows can be
found at the following link: (scroll to top of page for many choices when
page loads) http://www.dfwx.com/master.html#unity
and
by clicking on the link below
Ring Exchange:
Marriage Officiant:
Bride's Name’s and Groom's Name, nothing is easier than saying words. And nothing is harder than living them, day after day. What you promise today must be renewed and practiced again tomorrow, the tomorrow after that, and all the tomorrows after that.
Wedding rings are a symbol of the unbroken circle of love. May they be a daily reminder of your vows to each other and your resolve to live together in unity, love, and happiness.
Officiant:
Bride's Name’s
and Groom's Name, as a symbol of your love and respect for each other, do you now
wish to exchange rings? (Respond
“We do” or “I do” together
Groom's Name, please give your ring to
Bride's Name’s by placing the ring on Bride's Name’s hand with the words……..
(Choose
from those below or compose your own ring vows.)
1. "With this ring I thee wed."
Bride's Name’s, please please give your ring to
Groom's Name by placing the ring on Groom's Name
hand with the words…..
6. "With this ring I thee wed."
10.
The words of your
choice……………………
Optional Section: Ceremony or reading
(Optional Unity Candle Ceremony) Some couples choose to perform a Unity candle (or Hand Ceremony, or Sand ceremony--ask for details if you may want to consider such a ceremony). If you wish to perform the Unity Candle or other ceremony, it usually takes place here. For unity candle ceremony ideas click here> http://www.themarriageman.com/unity_candle_ceremonies.htm )
(If you do not choose a Unity candle ceremony, we go directly to the Pronouncement after the exchange of rings, unless you would like a reading or blessing as part of the ceremony at this time. Although many couples choose to not have a candle ceremony, a reading or a blessing, Here are a few examples of readings and blessings--I can provide others, or you may, if desired, provide the reading/blessing of your choice.
Pronouncement by
officiant:
Bride's Name’s
and
Groom's Name, you have consented together to be bound to one another in lawful
marriage. You have made special promises to each other which have been
symbolized by the joining of hands, the taking of vows, and by the giving and
receiving of rings.
By the
authority vested in me, according to the laws of New Jersey, I now pronounce you
husband and wife. (Option
Kiss:
"You may now seal your vows with a kiss. (or, "You May Now Kiss Your Bride." or, nothing is said, you just kiss, or, words of your choice.
Congratulations and Best Wishes!
(Click on the "Back Button" on the Toolbar to Return to Previous Page)
Also, For Optional Readings Please Scroll Down
Optional reading examples: ( any reading, poem, etc. of YOUR choice
---you are not limited to the suggestions here--- can be used ----many
couples do not have a reading. Some have the reading take the place
of a blessing near the end of the ceremony; some couples prefer no reading or
blessing at the end; the
choice is up to you. The reading can be done by a
relative or friend, or by the officiant. A reading and/or blessing can also be
substituted elsewhere in the ceremony.)
Samples:
A
marriage ceremony represents one of life's greatest commitments. But it also is
a declaration of love. I wish to read to you what Paul wrote of love in a letter
to the Corinthians. Many believe it is a true model of love and it is a model of
love you may wish to pursue in your marriage:
"Love is very patient and kind, never jealous or envious, never
boastful or proud.
Love is never haughty or selfish or rude.
Love does not demand it's own way. Love is not irritable or touchy. Love
does not hold grudges and will hardly notice when others do it wrong.
Love is never glad about injustice, but rejoices whenever truth wins out.
If you love someone, you will be loyal to them no matter what the costs.
You will always believe in them, always expect the best in them, and will always
stand your ground in defending them."
OR
Marriage
deepens and enriches every facet of life.
Happiness
is fuller, memories are fresher, commitment is stronger, even anger is felt more
strongly, and passes away more quickly.
Marriage understands and forgives the mistakes life is unable to avoid. It
encourages and nurtures new life, new experiences, new ways of expressing a love
that is deeper than life.
When
two people pledge their love and care for each other in marriage, they create a
spirit unique unto themselves which binds them closer than any spoken or written
words.
Marriage is a promise made in
the hearts of two people who love each other and the potential of marriage
requires a lifetime to fulfill.
Regarding
Marriage, Philosopher Walter Pinder wrote:
Everyday you live, learn how to receive
love with as much understanding as you give it. Find things within yourself,
then you can share them with each other. Do not fear this love. Have an open
heart and a sincere mind. Be sincerely interested in each other's happiness. Be
constant and consistent in your love. From this comes security and strength. All
that we love deeply becomes a part of us on this day of your marriage. Try to
commit yourselves fully and freely to each other.
Optional
Blessings:
(The following examples
can, if you wish, be part of your ceremony, take the place of the Unity
candle ceremony or a reading/poem.) Many couples do not include a reading or a
blessing, and instead proceed right to the "pronouncement."
At
this time, we ask a blessing upon the marriage of Bride’s name and groom’s
name. May they be blessed with the guidance, strength and direction to make
their relationship grow and blossom in the years ahead. May their home be
blessed with joy and happiness, and may they strive together to make their hopes
and dreams come true.
Most of all, we ask that
they be blessed by the love and support of family and friends as they begin life
together as husband and wife.
And, from this day forth, may their worries be few, may
their joys be many, and may their love grow more abundantly with each passing
day. Amen.
OR
At
this time, let us pray and ask God's blessing on this marriage.
Heavenly
Father, we now turn to you. Bless and watch over Bride’s name and Groom’s
name as they begin life together as husband and wife. We ask you to protect
their home. May they always turn to you for guidance, for strength, for
provision, for direction. May they glorify you in the choices they make, and in
all that they do. Let them stand as an example of your faithfulness and love for
us all.
We
ask this in Your name, Amen.
OR
Wording of your choice.
Do You Wish to Acknowledge Loved Ones Who Have Passed Away? Some ideas are here.